The answer to this question has perplexed women for years. The
true reason for it underlies many of the common differences
between men and women. To begin, often when a relationship ends,
men tend to rebound quickly. This feels unnatural to many women,
who typically wait longer to get involved. This not only
confuses, but hurts women very deeply and is one of the most
common reasons callers contact our Mars Venus Coaches.
So, "why is he dating if he's not ready for a girlfriend?" This
is a complex question and often men themselves don't know the
answers. If you suspect you're dating a rebound man, consider
the following types before deciding if he's the right one for
you:
1. The Hungry Man
A man on the rebound is like a man starving for food. He can
fall in love with almost anyone who offers him a few crumbs of
love. Once his neediness is satisfied, he becomes more
discerning. It's as though he wakes up from the dream and is
suddenly no longer interested in the woman that he was dating.
Men in this stage quickly drop the woman that they are with,
simply because they no longer feel the hunger.
2. The Needy Man
After a relationship ends, a man may feel like a failure. To
prove his manhood, he will seek a woman who can give him the
approval that his last relationship didn't give him. The woman
he seeks will be "so different from my ex." The new woman is
everything the old woman was not. Be aware that this is a man
who is looking to prove to himself that he is OK. A woman's love
can make him feel good about himself and support his healing
process. But he must be careful not to make promises. He is
searching for validation that he is "good enough, and gosh darn
it, people like him!"
3. The Player Man
One of the biggest obstacles for men in the process of healing
their hearts is their hunger for sex. It's very easy for a man
to confuse his need for love with his need for physical
intimacy. Although he may sense that he's not ready to get
involved emotionally, he wants to get involved sexually. This
casual sexual involvement will no doubt provide temporary
relief, but it will not heal long-term. If you're involved with
a player, don't forget that his true intention is to satisfy his
sexual needs and not to fall in love. Player men can be lots of
fun, but if you're looking for a soul mate, he's not the one for
you.
4. The Bigger, Better, Deal Man.
This guy is moving quickly from woman to woman looking for Mrs.
Right. He thinks the perfect woman is out there...if only he can
find her. He reasons that, by spending too much time in one
relationship, he may be missing the opportunity to find the
right woman. Instead of exploring a relationship fully, he ends
them at the first sign that it isn't working. With greater
insight regarding the process of finding a soul mate, he can
relax and take his time.
Remember, in the game of love, to be a winner you have to pick
your partner right. To learn more about your new man and if
you're dating a marriage minded partner or someone who is just
in it for "now," contact a Mars Venus Coach. In as little as one
session you can save yourself the pain and frustration of dating
the wrong men, and begin looking for the right ones. To learn
more please visit us at http://www.askmarsvenus.com
About the author:
John Gray is the author of 15 best-selling books, including Men
Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, the number one best-selling
relationship book of the last decade. In the past ten years,
over 30 million Mars and Venus books have been sold in over 40
languages throughout the world.
An expert in the field of communication, John Gray's focus is to
help men and women understand, respect and appreciate their
differences in both personal and profes
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