|Exchanging holiday gifts during the initial stages of a dating
and relating poses many overwhelming questions; in particular,
how much to give without appearing shuddersome? Over-gifting and
even re-gifting are verisimilar to showing up at a celebration
with an inappropriate party favorite. It's almost tantamount to
bearing caviar and champagne to a tailgating party or showing up
at a Passover Seder dressed in a Nazi costume.
During the midst of a budding relationship, there are not any
written rules defining the proper gift versus an inappropriate
one. In the realm of exchanging holiday gifts, two objectives
are necessary to impactful giving: matching a present to the
recipient's personal style and making a memorable impression.
Maria Luciano suffers from the propensity of over-gifting. She
lavishes her suitors with extravagant gifts that scare the good
guys away and lure the wrong ones in. Her last boyfriend of
eight weeks made off with an iPod. Quite often, her generosity
is misconstrued as giving in the name of desperation.
Consequently, Maria has very few enduring relationships to show
for her high credit card bills.
Then again, Ralph Jacobs does the complete opposite. Since he is
carrying a lot of baggage from a failed marriage to a
materialistic vixen, he opts for recycling gifts. His concept of
giving entails re-gifting presents from family and friends. As a
result, his giving pattern makes him appear as a cheap, selfish
While giving is not a pre-requisite to a sustaining a
long-lasting relationship, there is an art to giving good
presents. The dilemma with over-gifting is that the person on
the receiving end deems the extravagant gift as a means to their
affections. As far as re-gifting is concerned, it is recommended
only if the objective is to turn-off the interest -because the
message articulates "please do not take me seriously..."
Use the following strategies and ideas to assess his gift
► Consider how long you have been involved
► Determine if the relationship is temporary or permanent
► Based on the span of the interlude --- stick to a
budget using the dating lifespan of your relationship (see below)
► Give openly without any expectations
Innovative Gift Ideas For Him
Gift Ideas for Him
Dating for 1-2 months Price range ($15-$45)
All-American - a subscription to Maxim or even Playboy
(gift say's that you're okay with his obsession with erotica).
For a minimal investment, opt for the Heineken Baby Keg (casual
Goobersexual - Budweiser 12 pack - Beer Mug or beer
coozies with favorite sports team on mug. As a cheap
alternative, buy a pair of sports socks then buy his favorite
team in a patch and iron it on the socks.
Artsy Dude - new sketchbook or drawing utensils (says
you appreciate is artistic talents).
Mr. Metro-sexual - a Pantherella socks, hair and body
shampoo by Acqua Di Gio Giorgio Armani, or DVD work out series
by tri-athlete, Anthony Carillo's Iron Yoga work-out
Renaissance Man - Zippo lighter, Jack Spade, passport
Gift Ideas for Him
Dating for 2.5 - 4 months
Price range ($45 - $100)
All-American - Gap hat and scarf set, Boss Hugo Tie,
Goobersexual - his favorite sport's jersey, book on
sports, or Nautica pullover- etc.
Artsy Dude - Montblanc notebook or Cole Haan money clip.
Mr. Metro-sexual - spa facial treatment (says you
appreciate is metro-sexuality) Jack Black texture cream, Aveda
defining whip, 2 (x) IST underwear duo.
Renaissance Man - Eddie Bauer vest, or the Swiss Army
satchel, Truefitt & Hall - shaving kit
Gift Ideas for Him
Dating for 5 - 11 months
Price range ($110- $350)
All-American - camping gear, Marc Ecko sweater, or
Goobersexual - skiing peripherals, golf/tennis
equipment, or tickets to favorite sporting event
Artsy Dude - tickets to Sundance Film Festival, Swedish
massage, or shoes by Camper
Mr. Metro-sexual - Ralph Lauren cashmere sweater or
Alain Mikli eyewear
Renaissance Man - Kenneth Cole hoodie, ESQ Swiss watch
or two personal training sessions.
At the same token, giving represents the opportunity to give
some life altering hints in a sharing, caring and subtle kind of
way. For example, if he suffers from halitosis or plaque ridden
teeth, Philips Sonicare IntelliClean system is the ideal gift to
promote good dental hygiene. Even better, if you want him to
trade in his tidy whiteys for boxer shorts, the holiday season
features the chance to expand his underwear awareness.
Regardless of the presents one shares this holiday season, it's
important to give with élan, creativity and with the future of
your relationship in mind. To learn more about giving and
receiving in relationships, review Dating For I Do," the
Single's Guide to Establishing a Long-term Relationship.
About the author:
Holly Bentz is the author of the Single's Guide to Establishing
a Longlasting Relationship, "Dating For I Do." Visit fruitionmedia.net or Dating For I Do for more
information on the author.
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